11:32am- Boyfriend must drag me kicking and screaming from M.S. Eugenie. Don’t want to leave behind such a beautiful ship. Don’t want to leave behind the gun-toting tourist police with their adorable blue and white sailor costumes. And I certainly don’t want to leave behind my daiquiris. At last minute, escape boyfriend's grasp but the force sends me flying right into water. Hit head on bow and drown.
11:45am- New tour guide, Emad, picks us up and drives us to explore High Dam. Notice small stress fracture on side of dam wall. Grows bigger as I make run for it. Never was swift runner.
1:01pm- On way to Aswan, Emad then takes us to see Unfinished Obelisk. Make boyfriend pose so looks like obelisk is penis. He is not amused. I am, uproariously so. Suspicious, guard confiscates camera, sees picture and executes me on the spot.
Other than that, pretty good day.