9:05am- Run of the mill car crash. Self-important SUV driver. My body, guts, and car parts strewn about I-280. Thankfully, phone call SUV driver was having before impact clarified whether or not best friend was a slut for having slept with guy from bar last night. Verdict: Innocent, Your Honor.
7:45pm- Spider fright. While driving, creepy spider crawls up near shift stick. Am able to flick it away using The Club. Aware that at any point, spider may return. As I turn onto Cesar Chavez downshifting to 2nd gear, spider does indeed return, skittering across my hand and causing me to perish from fear.
7:47pm- Crushed between two cars. While waiting to cross Cesar Chavez to get to band practice, fast-driving car swerves over and smacks parked car. The force creates a domino effect of parked cars smashing into the one in front of them. Unluckily, I am standing between my Miata and a Mini Cooper. The impact severs my body in half and I bleed out, coherent (at least momentarily) of my state of dismemberment.
Other than that, pretty good day.