Security Threat

10:37am- While riding airport shuttle guy hits me in head with cane. I clock him good and am ambushed by Friends of the Disabled.

11:32am- Video monitor not fully bolted to ceiling of bus and guess who is sitting right underneath?

12:46pm- Walking through security gate at Reno Airport. ID checker is overweight, white-haired jokester. He high-fives a small child and tells a woman in front of me to “keep that smile goin’.” I scowl on principle, which causes him to question my threat-level. To be sure, he tasers me. I drop to ground. Heart stopped.

12:47pm- Not yet through security gate, ID checker busts into vociferous rendition of “Simply The Best.” He pounds his ample feet upon the ground to mimic Tina Turner’s drum line. This causes floor to give way and we end up ensconced by rubble in the arrivals area.

2:42pm- Plane crash.

Other than that, pretty good day.